Beautiful

I never would have guessed I would ever say these words but....I buzzed my daughter's head today. I have been wanting to do it and last night she decided that she would like to have it done today. I got it buzzed down to 1/4 inch and then she looked in the mirror and started crying. She said "Mommy I still want to be a girl. I don't want to be a boy!" That's when I lost it. We hugged and cried together and I explained that Heavenly Father made her a girl and that the length of her hair couldn't change that. She was still a bit upset but we did a few puzzles and soon she was fine. The only other time she said something negative was when she said (in a sad, worried voice) "I'm afraid daddy is going to say I look like a boy". I assured her that would never happen and then sent a quick text to Josh to remind him to be extra sensitive on Skype tonight and say how beautiful of a girl she is! I was so happy when she said to her friend, Kailey, tonight "Hey, do you like my haircut?" She seems comfortable with it right now. I'm sure there will be moments ahead when she will miss her hair, but I'm so proud of how brave she is!

Around 8:30 tonight Annabelle was starting to fall asleep and I was happy to think we were getting back on a normal schedule. Then her Fortaz (antibiotic) infusion finished and they flushed her line with saline. Then when they went to Hep-lock it, it wouldn't budge. They can't get anything to go in or out of her smaller line. She has a double lumen, meaning there are 2 different tubes that branch out of her central line. The larger one is working great, but the smaller one is acting like it is clamped, but it's not! I made them change the cap and that didn't work. Then the charge nurse tried that again...no luck. Now they are trying some t-PA which is meant to dissolve any clots in the line. We are still waiting to see if it works but it just doesn't seem that really is the problem. If if doesn't work, they will try t-PA again, and if that doesn't work they'll get the Dr to decide what next. I hope we get it resolved soon so that we get some decent sleep tonight. So, I hate to leave you all hanging, but I'm signing off for the night. Oh, one more thing....Annabelle's ANC was 1100 this morning. Yay! She can leave her room again and go for a walk or go to the play room. It has almost been 24 hours since she last fevered so if she is still fever-free in the morning she can start chemo again! (I never thought I'd be so excited to say that!)